Japanese Beautiful Model

please help? no kids please, no offence?

I'm desperately depressed, I've been through a lot, rape, bullying, bad relationships, I was brought up in a horrible home, I've been dragged around the country, had so many opertunitys stolen from me and had quite a bad drug habit for a while, me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 years, when we met I has heavily into drugs, glamour modeling, stripping and a whole lot more he took me away from that showed me I didn't need to keep searching for men's approvals and I could enjoy myself in different ways, he was so good to me perfect even, I moved in with him more or less straight away then a year and a half later my mum moved to the other side of the country I fell pregnant and my brother was sent to prison, then to make things worse his whole family fell out with me he begged me to abort, I lost my job my house my friends everything, I carried on with the pregnancy and lived in a hostel, now we live in a house in the middle of nowhere, he's a fantastic dad, I'm depressed and I'm scared, ive lost all myself confidence, I'm lonely, and I don't know what to do. I think I'm developing an eating disorder and. I think that's because its the only thing I feel I have any control over, I cry all the time, I'm almost sick if I have sex I tence up and shake and cry, we plan days out and then I wont go, I'm bitter about his family, I'm just terrible, he says he loves me and I can understand why he's bored of all this, but I beg him to help me and he wont, I tell him to leave me, I can cry all day and he wont bat an eyelid, he takes everything I say as some kinda dig, he doesn't even tell me things will get better, please tell me what to do, I can't do this anymore, would I be better off on my own, I don't know what happened, my body hasn't changed from pregnancy, I'm a good mum, I cook amazing meals everyday, my house is spotless x I'm only 21 and I am so scared I'm waisting my life and this is all I have to look toward to, and before anyone says it I know my son is most important and he wants for nothing I love him so much x

Public Comments

1. Without being offensive or rude, I would suggest you seek professional advice. It will make you feel much better. You are lucky you have a great husband!